MIssing HIs Mum

After one week, Hong Ling, my sister's eldest son in KL wrote the following in his e-mail:

 

 "Back to KL and life is as usual but these few days,in my mind,always think of our mum -our beloved mum whom passed away in such a surprise and sudden conditions, it is really not able to accept it at the moment, when I do my meditation or on the bed before sleeping close my eyes and try to think how our mum look speak and react, how she can just disappear from us in such a sudden time, it is really unacceptable.

I am having some imagination imagine mum or I lie in the coffin then buried in the grave and get the feel of how loneliness our mum is there, we lost her but to think of the other way of thinking, she is now closer to our pa and she is now, just next to him, it is one way of thinking but the other way, I still feel sad when I have mum picture in my mind.

Do you feel it? When mum is just next to us last week happily talk to anyone of us and today she is in another world where no way we can see her, touch her and speak to her...................."

Although his command of English needs a lot of improvement, I could sense the sadness and the sentiment.  This is an example of evoking real feeling while using imperfect language!

A sad day

This date 12th June, 2008 was indeed a very sad day for me.  My elder sister Huan Ee who is very close and dear to me, passed away!  I would say no doubt she loves me so much especially after we lost our mother at a very young age(I was 15 then).

Fond memories came back. I could recount so many instances where we shared our childhood. For example, she was the one who taught me how to weave the ketupat Melayu and in at least four different shapes.

Her children are especially close to me due to the fact that she always brought them visiting father (their 外公) and us.  We also shared many happy occasions in their childhood at the kampong environment. This close relationship with them also saw me visiting her four children residing in Singapore, namely Kiat, Nge, Keong and Sheow almost once every year.  And I know the names of all her grandchildren there. Last month I was in Miri visiting Hong Pie.

As to the cause of her death, I would call it as delayed treatment of a very emergency case.  Her stomachache turned out to be very serious condition where it required immediate attention and surgery.  Unfortunately for her, with her children all not around at that time(who would have made the right decision for her), she did not make the right decision.  And the delay of a right diagnosis and fast surgery was fatal.  How sad!

I think if an aged person stays alone, there should be an contingency plan in case there exists an emergency like the one experienced by my late sister.  Things like whom to contact for help and which clinic or hospital to go, including the doctors' names should be made known to the neighbor or relative or friend concerned.

Yesterday during her funeral, I saw how her children and relatives grieved for her.  She was such a loving person not only to her own children but to her relatives' children, the nephews and nieces.

So it was a really sad day for many people touched by her love!

May she rest in peace.